Tuesday, 2 February 2016

Gone Quiet

People who know me well are au fait with the fact that, if I am not my usual chatterbox self, it is a bad sign. There's been a lot going on lately in a background that my blogging life seldom touches. So many friends and family in need of practical help and emotional support and a work life that quickly threatened to take over more  time than is healthy because of events that are well and truly outside my control.

A straw suddenly broke the camel's back.  I'm not sure which one.  It could have been that it seemed impossible to fit in a trip to the physio for knee advice around all the pressing appointments at work.  My sleep hasn't been great for a while but over the last few days it's gone completely tits up.  I awake in the early hours panicking about what I have to do.  This needs nipping in the bud so I've been to the GP and been signed off many of my work duties for a couple of weeks.  I'm also armed with a short course of sleeping pills  to restore those ZZZZs.  And yes there's time to fit in that rehab appointment so I might be able to walk again without pain.  'I thought you were quiet.' said Salty Dog when I told her news that I felt might come as a surprise.  You see. They notice.

I pride myself on being resilient and strong and it's hard to share news about the toll that cumulative stressors have taken.  Yet I do so  as there will be others out there who need to stop the hamster treadmill that they too are on and take stock.  You know who you are.   Don't worry that acknowledging your own frailty is a sign of failure.  Far from it, taking action in a world so geared for success takes guts.

15 comments:

  1. If you don't look after yourself ( says she who doesn't really but I'm rubbish at taking my own advice ) you can't look after those you want to! Get better soon x

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  2. Oh indeed - you see, the minute you say it out loud, it becomes a reality that you're not as strong, independent and capable as you have made everyone think you are! Been there and not much liked the ensuing T shirt!
    However, after the initial shock of admitting life isn't quite so fab, it's a great relief to get some help and have a chance to heal again.
    I hope you feel rested and rejuvenated very soon :)

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  3. Good that you have seen the way you were headed, and hopefully taken action before things get too bad. A few good nights sleep will help! Look after yourself. X

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  4. We all need a little rest and tlc at times it doesn't mean we are weak just human. It takes great self awareness to realise it's time to slow down hand over to others for a while and take some much needed rest and recuperation. Take care of you and best wishes.

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  5. Everyone needs to unwind. May I suggest a weekend break (by yourself) to somewhere nice like Marrakesh, or Paris, or Barcelona. I used to do this, and it really does the job.

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    1. Would he lovely but my new bathroom is eating the pennies. Andalucia in the mountains with the girls. That's just a couple of weeks away. x

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  6. Some of the strongest people I know are the ones who suffer from anxiety and depression. Sometimes you just have to drop all the balls and then just pick up the ones that really matter and am really pleased that you have recognised and sought help when you needed it. That's not a sign of weakness that is a sign that you are helping yourself to recover. Sleep is so vital and restorative. My anxiety is appalling if I don't sleep. Take care and see you soonxx

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    1. Like the ball dropping, picking up bit! xx

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  7. We all need to take time out now and again to recharge. Don't rush your recovery and all will be well soon.
    Carolx

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  8. I'm so glad that you recognised the need for help quickly and before it all became too much. Take care. x

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  9. Very sensible to do something about it. Look after yourself: you are precious to many people.

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  10. sometimes you have just got to say no and put your own needs first. If you are good at what you do and reliable people sometimes don't realise that they are pushing your limits too far. Good for you, making a stand.

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  11. I'm so happy for you that you spoke up to your GP and are getting the restorative care you deserve. Thank you for sharing, and yes, there are those that feel for far too long they have to be superhuman and just get on with things. Reading it is strength, not a weakness, to put your needs first will surely resonate with others.

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  12. Thanks for all kind words.They nean a lot x

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