Wednesday, 14 December 2016

Little Red Messenger

As a family we lost  Esther my sister over four months ago now. My parents and brother, stay in  close touch, despite geographical distance, and seek solace in each other. My current experience of grief mirrors that of my brother's.  We don't think about her all the time but waves of sadness can hit quite suddenly.  I still cry more frequently than I let on to anyone.  In secret because excessive  emotion isn't part and parcel of British culture.   I'm accepting the tears, seeing them as restorative rather than a sign that depression is rearing its furry black dog-like head.  Grief is healing and, counter to what modern culture may be telling us, rarely has to be medicated.  Please bear that in mind if you are in a similar situation.  For as a mental health professional, I see pills prescribed rather too freely at times when people might be better off experiencing the emotions that are appropriate to the circunstances that they are under.

Those lovely robins come closer at this time of year.  The sensible scientific explanation is that the risks of starving due to reliance on nature's larder in the chillier months is far greater than those associated with hob knobbing with humans.  For even though we are dangerous beasties in the worldwide scheme of things we are suckers for wildlife and can mostly find a titbit or two for  a cute little birdie that comes begging.  However I heard the other day that seeing a robin is a sign that loved ones who have passed remain with you.   I was rather taken by that symbolism.  For my adopted sister, in spite of her Afro-Carribean blood, was always fond of the cold.


  1. My friend said exactly the same about a pair of robins which she saw on a daily basis after her Nan died earlier this year.

  2. My Dad always said that he would come back as a robin; seeing them is of great comfort to us, even after 21 years. When I went to K's at the weekend I noticed something new on the shelf in the lounge. It was an embroidery of a robin that bore the words, ' When robins appear, Grandad is near'. She too, takes solace in seeing them.

    1. Very cool. I'm glad others find them a comfort. xx

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