Saturday, 8 July 2017

Proven to Be Pinocchio

Okay, it may be a little inappropriate to tell this story but when has that ever stopped me?  Anyway Lou's been dining out on it for a couple of months so it's no secret in my circle.  I'm not sure what came over me when I attempted to try and convince my fourteen year old that I was, as near as damn it, a virgin.   After all it seems that way at times.   Not quite on a par with Mary, Mother of God,  I told him.  There'd been one slip off the path of purity and he, of course, was the result.

Lou told me very directly that he wasn't at all convinced and I thought that was the end of the matter. Little bit of nonsense done and dusted.   But no!   He returned to the subject a couple of hours later because he'd downloaded three lie detector apps to his phone.  I was subjected to the barrage of tests which included one that scanned my finger and one that supposedly analysed my tone of voice.  I can't recall what I had to do for the third.  However I remember well that the results were unanimous. Apparently I'll be growing a nose like Pinocchio sometime soon!


  1. At the wassailing it's been known for the Morris dancers to call out for virgins....they seem to be thin on the ground so they've been willing to accept recycled ones....I've volunteered then!

    1. Sounds an excellent idea to me! xx